Friday, December 31, 2010
So we are almost out of here 2010. You have taken me on a rollor coaster this year. From almost loosing my mother in Jan to becoming her care giver this whole year. It is crazy to watch someone who has been sooo independant and full of energy slow all the way down to the point where I had to cut up meat on her plate at times. It has been the biggest acting challenge of my career, acting like im ok day in and day out. Acting like I dont just want to scream or punch a wall when I see my mom so sick all the time but trying to keep her spirits up by disguing my fear and sorrow for her. We have come a long way to look on the bright side. I did not loose her she is and always will be a fighter. She always shocks the doctors thats her style lol. She can be having a normal conversation with you with a 290/90 blood pressure. Some of my friends say im so strong, i dont feel that way some days I feel like all of my sunshine spirit all of my bubbly personality has been sucked dry, sometimes I dont want to smile or engage. Other days I feel like I am the luckiest person in the world to still be pursuing my dreams. It will only get better 2011. Im coming for you full steam ahead.